At the Chile Trail, we live for danger. Don’t believe us? Try this on for size. We’ve been known to let the gas tank get down to a quarter full before filling it up again. Yep, we know – madness. Once we waited to pack for holiday a whole week before we left. Crazy? You got it.
So when someone gave us a mandoline for Christmas we saw danger written all over it. For the uninitiated, a mandoline is a kitchen utensil with a flat frame and adjustable blades for slicing vegetables. The danger? Use it without the hand guard and you’ll find that it’s good for creating wafer thin slices of finger too.
Zucchini ribbons sliced on the mandoline.
How could we resist? Soon we were slicing everything that didn’t move from carrots to fennel to apples and pears. We thought about it using it on butter but realized that was just silly. This I’m-a-fancy-pants-chef-like-person-dish is the result of our borderline obsession with the mandoline.
If you don’t have a mandoline, you could use a super sharp knife or even try a vegetable peeler. Or you could stop being such a cheap so-and-so and buy one. They’re – as they say in England – cheap as chips. And then you too can take a walk on the wild side.
Ricotta is optional but you know you love it.
Serves 4
1.5 lb. zucchini – green, yellow, whatever
¼- ½ tsp. chile pequin
1 large clove of garlic, peeled and thinly sliced
3 Tbsp. pine nuts, lightly toasted
2-3 Tbsp. olive oil
1 lemon
Ricotta cheese (optional)
Wash the zucchini and give the stem end a light trim. Slice on the mandoline to create long ribbons. Or use a super sharp knife or vegetable peeler.
Place a deep frying pan on medium-high heat. Add the olive oil. When it’s warmed, add the chile pequin. The chile should sizzle and spit. Don’t be deterred – remember, we live for danger. Add the garlic, give it a quick stir and then immediately add the zucchini (if you’re busy texting your buddy you’ll find that you’ve burned your garlic).
Season with salt and stir fry for a few minutes. The zucchini should relax but you don’t want it limp. Remove from the heat and stir in half of the pine nuts. Place the zucchini on a platter. Finely grate the lemon over the zucchini. Slice the lemon in half and give the veg a few generous squeezes of lemon juice. Sprinkle the remaining pine nuts over the top and add another hit of chile pequin and generous dollops of ricotta cheese, if you’re using.
Sit down and eat. You deserve it. You’ve faced danger and come out the other side.
Don’t forget to add more chile. Always more chile.
Well, this is it. Another year is gone (good riddance 2020) and a long winter stretches ahead of us. While January is technically only 31 days, we figure those are dog days so it’s actually 217 days in total. Makes sense doesn’t it?
If your birthday is in January, apologies for disrespecting your month but be honest – wouldn’t you rather a summer birthday? But survive we will, each in our own way. Perhaps you’ve dusted off the backgammon set or taken up stamp collecting or knitting. Some of you may make like a bear and try to sleep your way through the month (just don’t forget your zoom call with the boss on Thursday morning…). 
Needs must, as my Granny used to say. But then again, no one ever really listened to her, did they? Basically, do what you need to do to make it through the month. By all means, take up a new language or simply try to remember your first one – we’re flexible.
Serves 6
You’ve got to love a minimalist – that individual who honestly thinks that less is more. They love paring down their possessions to one set of underwear, some black pants and a white t-shirt. They talk about ‘freedom’ from possessions and how liberating it all is.
And when it comes to cooking we’re not shy of an ingredient or ten. Take our green chile blue cornbread mix. It is the bee’s knees on its own. It’s so good that all you need to add is water or milk and some eggs and you’re done. But, if you’re in a OTT mood, it’s just the ticket too. We like to add corn, semi-dried tomatoes, and crumbled goat’s cheese. You could toss in some chopped green onions, toasted pecans or pine nuts, and chopped cilantro too. 
1 x 9.84 oz package of 
Spare a thought for Linus Urbanec, who holds the coveted title of most Brussels sprouts eaten in one minute. How many, you ask? Thirty-one sprouts. And before you say, ‘I could do that’, don’t. Just don’t. Urbanec had to spear each sprout with a toothpick, eat and swallow before moving swiftly on to the next. Can you imagine the internal reverb after eating over 30 sprouts in a minute? Ouch. On second thought, forget Urbanec – spare a kind thought for his friends and family.
(Word has it that a truck driver named Wayne Sherlock, topped this record in 2019, by two more sprouts for a total of 33. That might seem like a narrow victory but in life, every sprout counts.) 
But it’s not fair. It’s criminal. Brussels sprouts are low in calories, a source of protein, and contain loads of Vitamin K and C plus Vitamin A, folate and manganese. We’re talking super food here folks. And if they sometimes taste like boiled tennis shoes dressed with a jot of eau-de-sulphur, it’s hardly their fault. Far too often they’re overcooked into slimy submission. 
There are people who don’t like garlic. Of course, many of them are vampires, sleeping during the day and on a strictly no-garlic diet. If you’re a vampire or simply not a fan, then look away now. Go do a load of laundry, the crossword puzzle or call you mother – you know she worries about you.
But if you like garlic – nay, love it – then this is for you. There are lots of good reasons to eat garlic or Allium sativum, for you Latin lovers. It’s been used as a medicine for centuries and fans say it’s good for everything from a healthy heart to warding off the common cold (I bet vampires get a lot of those).
But let’s be honest, the main reason is that it makes food taste great. I dare you to walk into a home (preferably of someone you know), smell the aroma of garlic gently sautéing in olive oil and not salivate like crazy. 
Serve to friends and loved ones and that slightly suspect guy from the office. It’s a sure fire way to find out if you’ve got a vampire on your hands. 
Summer is racing by at a gallop, as if chased by a slightly/very aggressive Autumn, eager to take its place. But let’s put the brakes on, folks. Let’s wring every last drop out of summer because when it’s gone, it’s gone. Well, at least for another year. Before you know it, you’ll be sitting around the fire, knitting long underwear and searching the web for yet another root vegetable recipe.
Spend every minute you can outdoors. Crank up the BBQ, open up that cheeky rosé you’ve been saving for a rainy day and breath deep. Because Summer won’t last forever. (Cue: 
Serves 2-3
Anyone need a stove? Please, take mine and put me out of my misery. Even looking at it makes me break out in a sweat. These days, you’ll find me standing in front of an open freezer, eating ice cream out of the container. Classy, right?
And even if you could stomach a pot of boiling water, who wants a plate of hot pasta? Or how about a nice hot stew? No. Way.
Serves 2-3
Hope you’re ready to stoke up the barbecue because it’s only a box of sparklers away from the Fourth of July. And we all know a barbecue is a legal requirement on the 4th. Okay, maybe not a law that’s actually written down or something mentioned in the Constitution but it might as well be. So let’s get your shopping list sorted: warm beer, burned burgers and some dodgy potato salad with sun-kissed (aka food-poisoned) mayo. Top it off with ice cream that some numb-nut forgot to put in the freezer and you’re sorted.
Or you could try – just try – and be classy for once in your life. Skip the beef and barbecue fish instead. Radical? Mad? Totally bonkers? Hear me out: monkfish is a dream to grill – full of flavour and firm enough to hold its own. Or you could use swordfish or splash out on tuna. Not feeling fishy? Go for chicken thighs. Put some rosé on ice to chill, crank the tunes and dazzle your guests.
Summer doesn’t start for a good couple of weeks but it seems like nobody bothered to tell Mother Nature. Everything is growing like a weed, including – sadly – the weeds. Some old soul once said that a weed is just a flower growing in the wrong place. Thanks. Please do remind me of that next time I’m on my hands and knees, yanking out another ‘flower’.
And then there are the sounds of summer. The birds tweeting, the leaves rustling in the breeze, and your neighbor swearing (loudly) as he tries to start the riding lawnmower. Of course, there are always the folks across the street who decided to tear up their lawn and replace it with a paved patio, astro turf and giant plastic kids’ pool. Smile and wave. To each his own.
And you? You eye that spot in the shade and dream of something cold to eat and a restorative nap, camouflaged as ‘reading’. A chile-spiked ice pop is just what the doctor ordered. Eat it quickly before it melts and ignore the weed – I mean flower – growing next to you.
Makes 12 x 1.25oz ice pops
Yes, you read that right. 30% off everything at 
If you need inspiration, we’re sharing our recipe for Citrus lamb with achiote and habanero. Yes, a discount and a recipe. So don’t be looking for a Christmas card from us this year, okay? Achiote is a real find (note to self: add to your Los Chileros shopping basket). It’s got an earthiness about it and lends a show stopping red hue to your food. For this baby, we’ve blended it with orange juice and some habanero. Well hello sunshine!
The Chile Trail 